Stop the Madness! Are You Spending Too Much Time Worrying About Being Single?

Our single mom advice maven talks about being stuck on being single rather than just living your big, fat, juicy life! Take it away, Goddess T! -aa

Hello Single-ista!

I’m Tinzley and I’d like to help you find out if YOU are putting way too much time and energy into finding a soulmate and worrying about being single.

We all want “it.” The life that we think is the happy life. We want a good job that pays well, we want great friends who make us laugh and who we can depend on, we want a family who loves and supports us and we want to be in a loving relationship that is balanced, joyful and keeps us sane.

We see it every day, what appear to be happy couples who look just perfect together. We watch TV and everyone always ends up with the guy or girl of their dreams then they run off and live happily ever after. We sit and wonder, why can’t that be me? But when is it time to stop worrying about being single and simply enjoying the life that we have right this very moment?

It can be tough to meet someone special, fall in love and hope that things turn out perfect only to find out the hard way, that things don’t always turn out perfect. Many times you are looked at funny for not being married or at least have a long term committed relationship by the time you reach a certain age.

So how can you tell if you are starting to stress too much over being single?

1. Every couple you see you’re going “Awww I wish I could have that, but oh no I have to be single.” Don’t talk about your singlehood as if it’s some sort of disadvantage. You have no idea what’s going on in someone’s relationship. Have you read about the divorce rates lately?

2.You spend hours and hours on dating sites trying to snag the perfect mate. Calm down and stop looking so hard. Online dating is fun. Take it easy. When the time is right, he will come!

3. When your married friends or friends in relationships invite you somewhere, you almost never want to go because you feel like you’ll be the only “single” person there. Try it — I’m sure some of them have single friends.

4. You down yourself often because you don’t feel lovable or wanted. It’s not always you who’s the problem. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

5. You’re always saying, “I gotta find me a man, I’m tired of being single.” Watch out, you may settle for the wrong person just out of pure desperation. The grass isn’t always as green as it seems.

6. Your conversations are mostly about being single and how you’re coping or not. No one wants to be around someone if that’s all you talk about. Your joy shouldn’t be defined by someone else.

7. I’m sure we’ve all heard this one, “I’d be so much happier if i wasn’t single.” Trust me; you have to make yourself happy.

8. You don’t want to do things anymore because you only think couples have fun together. You have to get out and live, not stay trapped in feeling lonely.

Life is filled with too much joy and hope for anyone to spend it moping about being single. I suggest taking on something you’re passionate about: painting, gardening, blogging, roller skating, dancing, singing, or what ever it may be. Find something that brings you joy and fulfillment in your life.