Belize is one of the healing centers of the world, and it was the home of this year’s Goddess Pray Love healing and spiritual retreat with Abiola.
Hello, my name is Shu Oceani and I am the founder of Sacred Lovers Academy and ShuOceani.com. So I’m coming on to do a video testimony for the lovely Goddess Abiola and the healing Goddess Pray Love Belize Retreat.
Goddess Shu’s Belize Spiritual Retreat Story[ Vimeo Video Link ]
by Goddess Shu[Transcript by Goddess Michaela]
I’m choosing to share my story via video because one of the reasons I went there was I want to be seen. I don’t want to just write words. I want you to see me.
So the way that I found Abiola, I was really in search of someone that was a business coach but also had the spiritual component that for me was extremely important. Um, I had had business coaches before, but nothing really that didn’t resonate with me. We were not in alignment. I’m very masculine type of energy.
I wanted someone who dealt with business from the spirit, from the soul, um, from the inside out, not from the outside in. Okay. Why don’t you come to the Goddess Pray Love Retreat. Well, I came there for several reasons. One, I wanted to finally have the courage to be seen and I wanted to remove whatever I want to ever it was that was blocking me and that was holding me that I was allowing to hold me back from being seen. That was one too. My son was murdered last year and I had a lot of pain in me that I wanted to release and I wanted it to come up any residue because um, yeah, I needed that to come up. I needed that to come up and out. Um, the third thing was anything that was holding me back from being the best, highest version, the fullest expression of myself, I was ready to release it.
I was ready to release it because I was tired of the same old story. It was like my life was on repeat, you know, how you listen to a song over and over and over again. And I felt like I was no longer in the present. I was constantly in the past or fantasizing about the future, but it was just constantly this repeat, repeat, repeat. So I wasn’t even present, you know, and I wanted to release anything that was keeping me from being the fullest expression of myself and that was keeping me from being fully present. Have you ever attended other retreats previously? Yes, I have. Um, I’ve gone to Queen Afua for liberation and her sacred woman retreat when, um, I completed her certification for the sacred woman program. I also went to Ms Dot Donovan, Zach’s retreat. Um, I’ve been to African American women on tour, um, retreat.
I’ve gone to so many, like smaller retreats, but those are the major ones that stand out to me. And of course Goddess Abiola and Goddess Pray Love Belize Retreat.
What did you expect from the retreat? Oh, I really didn’t know. I had no idea what I was going to. I had no idea what to expect. I was just open to receiving whatever it was that I was supposed to get out of it. I’m a part of me wanted to put expectations on it, but I felt like if I put an expectation on it that I would limit my experience and I would just be looking for just that expectation instead of opening myself up to the full expression, the full of possibilities of everything that, that retreat broad. Um, so yeah, I really didn’t have any expectations. I knew what I came there for.
Um, but I did not have any expectations whatsoever of how I was going to be, what it was going to be. Was it going to be this way? It was going to be that I just left myself open. I didn’t want to place any interpretations or ideas of how it was going to be again, because I didn’t want to limit my own person experience. Okay. Tell us about your Goddess Pray Love Retreat. Where do I begin? The retreat? First of all, it was amazing. Like, I feel like amazing is. It’s just a word, like I can’t really put it into words. It was amazing. It was exciting. It was healing transformational life affirming life, giving infinite possibilities. Very spiritual. I’m very much in alignment, very calming, very soothing, very nurturing. There are so many adjectives that I could give to describe it, but none of them can really describe.
I don’t know, it’s like a word limits it for me. Um, but I do know that I will never be the same. I will never ever be the same that I’m like, it was amazing. Like right now it’s been about a month. Just actually been a month since I’ve left and I am now jazz now. I’m fully allowed to experience, down low inside of me. It’s taken, you know, that length of time. But I, I wanted to really process everything. But that trip was so transformational. Very healing. So many breakthroughs so many. There was. So it was, it was amazing. I loved all the beautiful goddesses that were there. I love that. We were all beautiful reflections of one another. And you know, what I really loved. I loved Mama Norma. Abiola’s mom. Um, I love this woman so much because there was two things that she did that really stood out to me and I just thought she was so courageous.
One, she said, I came here to learn from my daughter. That in itself was so powerful. Um, because I grew up with a mother and I, and several people that I know where it came from, the era of do as I say, you know, you can’t tell me anything. I’m the mom. And to hear her mother expressed that and to say that and to, to share her experiences with us. She truly like, I knew intellectually and I felt in my heart that our life is a journey and that there really is no destination. But Mama, Norma, Oh Mama Norma let me know that it is a journey. It does not matter. You’re always on a continuous journey. And that the moment that you stop being open to receiving the gifts from everyone, lessons, gifts, whichever you choose to call it, you will limit yourself. And she represented infinite possibilities for me.
And she also made me want to reestablish a relationship with my, my mother. I’m just the way that she was with her daughters, I was like, wow, that I just thought it was so beautiful. Um, so yeah. Um, I made great connections with women, shared things with women. I’m just me being myself. Um, women were expressing things. They were learning from me and they were thanking me for things, but, and I was just being myself and I just always remember Abiola says, you know, just be you, just be you. And um, and that’s enough. And I, I fully know that I am enough. And I also saw how, how small I had been playing in all areas of my life. There was some ways I didn’t even know, you know, but it became very apparent when I was there. Just the many ways that I had been playing small and the stories that I had told myself that I had created and that I believed.
But one thing’s for sure I will never pretend in the keyword is pretend to be powerless. I will never pretend to be not enough because I am enough. I’m more than enough. I’m beyond powerful. I am, one of my favorite moments was, and I say this every day, Abiola gave us goddess poses and we were standing in our strength and it was the goddess, okay. Warrior sorceress and a lover. So I constantly remind myself of those things when I feel something met some of those stories trying to come up and like trying to rear their head. I’m like, no, no, no. I am a goddess. I am a warrior, a warrior. I am a sorceress. And I’ve upgraded that for myself to a sexual assaults or is based on what my initiatives right now. Thank you. Yeah, Abiola. Okay. Um, like I, I can go on and on about this.
So yeah. Um, when did you take away from the most from Abiola’s group sessions? My favorite group session was when we did the pictures of ourselves and we drew pictures of ourselves, of how we present ourselves to the world and then how we really are inside, what we really feel and then what we really are, you know, and that was powerful to see the transformation. Um, and to see it in art from art form and then I also loved the session when we had to intentionally script out who we are going to be next year 2019 at that same time because I will be at her retreat next year and I’m still have my card and I will bring it in with. I will have it with me reading from their affirming all these things and celebrating that all those things that I affirmed and set the intentions for have come true. So, um, have manifested. So, um, that was very, very powerful for me.
What was your favorite part of the retreat? So yeah, I wrote about dinner and writing out our intentions for next year and I’m having dinner in the evening with all of the goddesses and us sharing our visions, our intentions. And then we played this game. Um, and it was similar to the intention game, but it was a brag upgrade dress shit game is exactly what we were playing. And um, Goddess Shane suggested it. And we all went around sharing, um, we did our brags and then we upgrade and we kept doing this over and over and over again. I think we did like five rounds of it and each time it became more and more and more, and I was feeling it. The more that I did it, the more that I felt it inside of me. And then to have the comraderie of my sister’s right there with me cheering me on and they’re like, yeah, she’ll, I really love watching you on TV.
I love the exercises that you had in your workbook. Yes, your retreats were off the chain gun. I’m booking my ticket for next year. And just the way we were all encouraging one another. It felt so good. It felt so good and I had never felt that supported before I’m ever, ever. Um, and that felt so good. It was a virgin experience for me to feel that supported by a group of women that I had just came and met. And, you know, we all came there with, with, with, um, we had guidance Abiola in common and, and there for that retreat, but leaving there, we all had. So we all saw, saw ourselves in one another. And um, so yeah, that, that was powerful. Um, what did you think about the medicine hike? Well, the medicine hike I was going to do and I was, we had started walking and then the guy had said there are some snakes.
Well, she, well she turned around. Yeah. I was like, oh no, no, nope, not going. So I turned around and I just live vicariously through other people’s experiences. I had them tell me what happened and, and I enjoyed it through them. Um, tamales, waste bead, Yay. I loved that. Was doing that. It felt so ancient. It felt so ancient. I felt like I had done that before with a group of sisters. And you know, it just felt ancient as getting, you know, preparing our dormant, you know, for our body and selecting the beads that we were attracted to. And a decorating. Our beautiful God is temple, our body, the sacred temple with these beads and Damali did a beautiful meditation and visualization and Damali’s smile is just amazing. And so she was very helpful and she explained a lot. I mean, I’m actually incorporating that into um, some things that I’m doing locally in live events here.
I’m actually a waste bead party for a central healing. And um, yeah, it was really amazing. And then speaking of Damali. Damali smells so good and I’m like, what is that? Like, what is, what is, what are you wearing? And she had this oil, the triple goddess all night, purchased it and Ugh, it smells so good. It’s heavenly. So that was exciting. And then the cookhouse ceremony, uh, loved it. Drinking with intention. That experience has made me more present with the foods that I drink. The. I mean, I’m sorry, with the things that I drink and the food that I eat, it’s made me extremely present with that. Um, so that was a very powerful ceremony and the fresh organic food. Can we talk about this? The food was so amazing. Okay. I’m just to wake up number one and see these beautiful flowers everywhere, these hibiscus flowers, to decorate our hair with them and to see them decorating our bed and to have them decorate our plate.
Everything is fresh. Everything is fresh. The food tastes completely different there. Nothing was processed, nothing. And my body felt the difference. Um, when I came back and I weighed myself, I had actually released like seven pounds from that, just eating nothing but organic healthy foods, fresh juices, no sugar, nothing processed. Um, and then the staff, the staff was so amazing. Like I had never been taken care of like that. Literally all we did was show up. Literally. We just showed up and we were taken care of from the moment we said down to the moment we got up to leave. The staff stayed late. We were there late commiserating with one another, laughing, talking, and they stayed there faithfully serving us and now was like, just so beautiful. It just was so beautiful. Um, and then the massages. Yes. And yes. I’m your, those massages where the bomb.
I’m amazing. My body felt out loose and yeah, it felt really, really great. I totally love the massage. Totally loved the massage. Um, what did you think about visiting the Mayan Ruins? Very transformational. The Mayan ruins were so powerful just to be in the presence. Um, and to hear the stories of this group of people, ancestors as well that were there and um, to just be there and knowing that thousands and thousands of years ago these people were there and they have this, this one, I call it a sacred pyramid, that the steps were so steep. And um, I was like, okay, sure you can do this. And it was so many times I was like, oh, that’s a lot of steep steps. Can you do it? I was like, I’m going to do it. And I felt so good walking to the very top and overseeing everything that was out there at those ruins.
It was amazing. And I loved the hugging tree. Um, when it, any tree that it embraces, it hugs it into the world, it, it dies. But the way that I received it was it becomes one with the tree. I didn’t see it as dying. I started is merging with the tree and becoming something bigger. Um, so that for me was beautiful. Um, yeah, just, just that whole trip was amazing. The, the people greeting you. I’m not. Hello, but hello my friend. Beautiful. Hello, my friend. It’s like no one is a stranger. Very helpful. Um, yeah, I really, really enjoyed it. Um, what was your experience with belly dancer? Maryam? Okay. Let’s talk about Maryam. The thing that stood out in my most favorite experience with Maryam, and I have to read this because it was, it was powerful. Maryam said the intensity of an emotion is only 90 seconds, 90 seconds, and then it’s upside and we choose to hold onto it mentally it making it bigger than what it is.
And then Abiola bounce back and added to that. If we take that same 90 seconds and hold the vibration of what we’re calling into our life, it will manifest as well. And I love that. And she was saying how, you know, what happened if it only lasts for 90 seconds. And I thought about the times that I had held onto things that just don’t know. I was like, why are you even upset about this? Why are you even sad about this, Shu? Why are you even thinking about this? Then it was only 90 seconds and now you have it on your body, on your thighs, in your hips, you know, and she talked about how and when we do not release these emotions, how they, um, the reside in the body. And so yeah, I thought that that was, that was amazing. Um, and, and that was a life changing.
And she said, breathe your way through challenges. You must release the emotions. I’m hip release this release trapped emotions. Um, so yeah, that was very powerful. What was your experience with goddess Arzu? And resolve your mind? Hiller. Okay. The Mayan Healer reserve, Yo, forever. She changed my life also. Um, she told me, she told me I didn’t even share with her about what my son. And she told me that my heart had been broken and that I had was setting up an infection around my heart from the sadness and the hurt and not being able to release and let go. And she told me, she said, you have to let him go, you have to let him go and, and, and move on so that you can move on to say, because you are getting, you’re getting an infection around your heart. And um, she told me food to eat, she told me what to do.
And she told me, she said at the end of this year, she said, you’re not going to look the same way. She said that dense. She was talking about the weight because say that denseness is going to be gone. That will be no, you won’t have that. Um, and uh, but yeah, and she gave me, she prescribed to me things to eat daily things to drink daily. And since I’ve been home I have incorporated everything and I actually, I feel amazing. Then also with her, this year is one of the calendars. They hurt children may these right there for us, like made these, these are my calendars and they all represent different things. I bought like three of them. Then one of her sons was a makeup artist. I told him he’s going to have to do my makeup when I come back over there, but it was just amazing.
And then here’s another one. Yeah, these were so beautiful. Yeah. These are Mayan calendars. I love them. Um, and Arzu there is not enough time to discuss Arzu on this video. Okay. She was one of the main attractions, that one that drew me to the event to connect with this lady and person and she did a reading for me that was so powerful. She told me she was like, shoo, the work that you’re doing, you are here to do you. It is necessary that you do sexual, um, healing and releasing the shame and the trauma for women just like, you have to, this is what you’re here to do. And I was like, okay, now mind you, I hadn’t even told her what I did. She just started talking, telling me this. She brought a lot of closure for me with my son. I’m Caitlin.
I’m, yeah, she, she answered a lot of questions about that. Surrounded his, um, death that I didn’t know. She also told me about challenges that I’m going to experience and she’s like, but you, that I’m going to experience with the, my child’s what? My granddaughter’s mother. Um, and she said, but it’s okay. Shoot. She said you are going to be okay. Um, yeah, it was just so much that she told me. And then I was, I did the basic plan, so I was coming back and when I left I was like, Ugh, I’m going to be sit here. I have to sit here and wait at this airport for all these hours. And all of a sudden there’s our zoo and you want to know the beauty. Everyone left. And I had Arzu to myself for three hours to two to three hours just educating me, teaching me, sharing with me.
Um, I’m going there in November for three months and I’m going to do her program with her that she has. Um, I’m most definitely going there and I’m bringing her here to St Louis for a retreat for women. In a sexuality retreat. Yes. She is the truth. Like, like, it’s so much. He told me it’s too much for this here. Video, these videos already long. But yeah, she is the truth. Um, the next thing, if someone wants to come on the Goddess Pray Love Retreat. She’s scared. What would you say? Fuck your fears. You have to go. It is necessary. The more afraid you are, the more you need to do whatever it takes to get there. Because I promised you that fear is a story and you’re gonna see all the stories that you’ve been telling yourself, there is something much bigger waiting for you.
Fuck your fears. Literally. Do not listen to them. Don’t let your fear stop you from this experience. Um, Abiola on camera is amazing. Her energy radiates out through the camera. But to experience that energy in person, oh my goodness, it is overpowering. It is, it, it. She feels the room up, very genuine appeal will, beautiful soul, Yoda, full soul, um, and she’s a beautiful reflection on myself and that’s what I love. She’s so humble and she constantly reminds you that she is you. So any things that you give her, any compliments you give her, she receives the compliments, but she also reminds you that says we are the same and that. Yeah, women need to experience that support to know what it’s like to be taken care of. Girl. Don’t be afraid. Go. You have to know you’re about to experience what it’s like to be taken care of.
You’re going to experience what it is like. Just show up. That’s all you gotta do is show up and everything happens. Like that was the experience too. It’s one thing to know that you’re well taken care of, you say it, but to have that experience, I was well taken care of. Okay. Um, what was your favorite part of the Belize Boutique Resort? A spot. Every single part of it. It was amazing. Beautiful, breathtaking. Like, yeah, it was amazing. Um, but if I had to pick one particular area, I love the pool area and I love the meditation role. I really loved that. Um, any activity in our location, dreams for future Goddess Pray Love retreats. Yes. Um, if you do it in the United States, I really like the Gulf islands in South Carolina. Um, Hawaii, someplace in Hawaii. Um, if overseas. I know that you said Greece, but what about Italy?
Um, so we’re over in Italy. Um, and also I like Ecuador. I think Ecuador would be nice someplace along the Mediterranean. Yeah, that would be amazing. Um, I liked the belly dancing. I like to incorporate like an art class or something or I’m like, we did the wave speeds. More artsy. Um, I enjoyed the workshops. I mean, I, I liked all of it but, but, but those are my suggestions. Um, uh, how would you like to be listed with your story? Shu. Oh, shiny to segregate lover, coach and the sexual sorcerer as. Yes. Abiola thank you. And what links would you like to share? Um, I, you can find me at shuoceani.com or Sacred Lovers Academy or a free gift DearYoni.com.
And will you be participating in the spiritual to life coaching program in the fall and the fall hell to the yes. I am A. Yeah, that is it. That is the end of my testimony. I answered all the questions. Is Thirty something minutes? Didn’t mean to go this long. It probably would have been longer, but it was amazing. And again, I thank you so much. Abiola. I am forever changed and forever transformed. I have no desire to hide or are any of that and those stories by, by, by, by never coming back. Um, again, it was so much that happened. Um, it’s taken this, it’s taken almost a month to just fully processed everything and I’ve taken my time and allowed myself to really experience it. At first I was trying to watch myself like, okay, come on, get back your pump, do this. No, I have all the time in the world and I’m good. Um, so yes. And, um, that’s it. I love you. Goddess Abiola. I thank you so much for creating such an amazing experience. Or do you want to call it a retreat? It’s a retreat, but damn, it’s, it’s more than a retreat. Um, it’s an inward experience, isn’t enlightenment and enlightenment experience like I can’t even describe. I can put it into words, but thank you so much guidance Abiola. Uh, thank you. Thank you. And thank you. Beautiful, beautiful goddess.